why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
