one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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