i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
