great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
