just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I am naked and annoyed.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
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