We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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