i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
