Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
it's great music for shaving your balls
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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