i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize