I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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