One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
