am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
tell me about the fingering
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
