I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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