I want to make a zoo with you.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
