Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
