Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
