You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
