It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
