This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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