remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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