It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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