There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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