I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
We got so high we made milksteak
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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