Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
