i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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