I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
