I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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