no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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