well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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