bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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