Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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