My nipple is on Facebook.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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