Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
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