i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize