We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
