k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize