he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
not ubering you a puppy
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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