2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize