He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
this just has baby written all over it
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
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Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
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This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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