i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
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I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
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You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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