Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
