When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
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