your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I love you.
Bad choice
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