we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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