I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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