so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
