brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
