So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I am naked and annoyed.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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