awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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