im drinking this country out of the recession.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
So much Jack, so little girl.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
